"How many members of the Bush administration does it take to change a 
light bulb?" Nine. 
 

"1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed; 

"2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb 
needs to be changed; 

"3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb; 

"4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either for 
changing the light bulb or for eternal darkness; 

"5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for 
the new light bulb; 

"6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, 
standing on a step ladder under the banner 'Mission Accomplished'; 

"7. One administration insider to resign and in detail reveal how 
Bush was literally 'in the dark' the whole time; 

"8. One to viciously smear No. 7; 

"9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush